 thoughts on her death... its surprising how she could draw these thoughts on me this morning on my way to work. she was a pop culture icon, someone from a humble beginning but made it big in the mainstream dream world, a playboy playmate and a model, a rich widow and a drug addict, remembered as the sexy star who married an old millionaire, mother of a 20 year old who died of drug abuse when his mother just gave birth to a baby and now 2 men claim to be the father. she was beautiful, rich, and famous. died at the age of 39. her life has been nothing like a tv show until her last minute where everyone was watching. the world now is driven by beauty, money, power, and fame. im guilty in finding myself geared to that direction too. but why do people who seem to have everything seem to have nothing at all... when you're breathless and cannot speak, you're as good as any lifeless animal. ultimatley, none of these things would matter in this borrowed time. maybe even everything of which becomes trash when you don't give importance to those intangible things that maybe only kids know. we leave our morals and values in our elementary class rooms where we think they belong. we sometimes forget that we used to be little innocent angels in kindergarden because we are too busy making money, dreaming big, collecting material belongings. we all like to be wanted and accepted here where we think only the beautiful and the rich thrive. smile often and give a little more, love deeply, live simply, love GOD above all and be happy. we all know these little secrets in making life worthwhile but we fail in the exam of living with it. we give ourselves to the world when we lose our values. we are lost when we want more than just a decent lifestyle, more than just one lover, more than what we could accommodate, and more than we just need. i always want to be reminded why i exist... let's not forget how red balloons used to make us smile. ============================================ | 
